Thursday, June 17, 2010


To say that I am stressed today is like saying that there was a little bit of oil spilled into the ocean.... Understatement! There is oil gushing into the ocean and I am maxed out.

This whole Mayo Clinic thing is great, BUT, getting all the papers from multiple Doctors is stressful. I had to call this morning and see which Mayo they had me at because my mom so unkindly pointed out it will probably be at least $1000 more to go to the Minnesota one then the Arizona. Me, I don't care about the money, I just want to feel better. So I called the forwarded me to the Arizona Clinic. So now I'm waiting for them to call. Hopefully today or tomorrow. And get all set up with them. Which really isn't that big of a deal, just more time on the phone, which I hate.

My regular Doctors office called yesterday and the office lady who said it would be $18 for the first 20pgs and 25c a pg after, talked to my Dr who had some other things she wanted to add and said I didn't need to be charged. Oh I do LOVE my Drs. All of them. I just need more I guess... Or different, ones that specialize in what I'm going through. Am I trying to convince you or me?

I got a letter from my lawyer yesterday that had to have notarize and returned. So after trying the places my mom told me to go to get it notarize(they couldn't) I went to the downtown bank. Took it to the lawyer, made an appointment for Monday morning, and that's where we are with that.

Boyfriend is driving me bananas. Seriously, I like him, A LOT. But I've not even known him 2 weeks yet. He wants to talk all the time, be together every second he isn't at work. I feel like he is trying to take over my life. I need time for Gabby too. I like to be with him, just not every second. I hate getting a text as soon as I walk out of work wondering when I'm going to do what with who. HATE it. My job requires me to make others happy, the whole time. When I get off I'm over it, I want to go home shower and crawl into bed. The time I don't spend at work, I'm babysitting, or at Church. And every once in awhile I do something with a friend. I have other friends than just him. What about them? I can't and won't give everything up for a boy. No.

I'm tired.
I'm emotional.
I'm frustrated.
I'm hurting.
I'm rational.

Rational? Yes. It doesn't fit. But is so true. I WANT to just fall for this guy. Not worry about the rest of my life. But I can't I have to be aware of what I do. I have to care about others on the way. I have to protect me. He has to understand. I can't handle him acting like this much more. Which is sad as I really like him.....

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